die a hero, live a villain

2009-07-14T05:39:00.000-07:00

-be humble-
-always think you are not good enough-
-look in the mirror and tell yourself you are beautiful-
-dont just sit there and cry, do something about it-
-life is too short to be sad-
-have lots of lots of lots of faith in GOD and youself-
-ALWAYS never give up!-

2009-07-12T04:55:00.002-07:00

its not easy, but i m still trying very hard.. i just feel effed up, seriously effed up.

2009-06-30T05:20:00.000-07:00

Wanna Get a tattoo... i just have this feeling to tattoo .. the words

"ZERO TO HERO"

~ to remind myself the kind of guy i wanna be..
to tell my to go out there and fight everyday
to tell myself , " man if u think i aint good enough, i just gonna prove u wrong!"

2009-06-26T19:42:00.000-07:00

man dunno whats up with my holidays.. just gone like that without doing much.. very much procrastinating and daydreaming during the hols..like wheres my goal and stuffs.. MAN! i need bruce to come back to me!! and cant really work this morning .. damn!

zero to hero zero to hero zero to hero zero to hero zero to hero zero to hero zero to hero .. keep telling myself!

2009-06-26T07:08:00.001-07:00

i am wearing thin down to the core

2009-06-25T06:47:00.000-07:00

Just wanna post this cos this is what i am feeling right now...

Akon- Dont Matter
[Chorus:]
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
'Cause I got you babe
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
'Cause I got you babe
'Cause we gon' fight
Oh yes we gon' fight
Believe we gon' fight
We gonna fight
Fight for our right to love yeah
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
'Cause I got you

Nobody wanna see us together
Nobody thought we'd last forever
I feel 'em hopin' and prayin'
Things between us don't get better
Men steady comin' after you
Women steady comin' after me
Seem like everybody wanna go for self
And don't wanna respect boundaries
Tellin' you all those lies
Just to get on your side
But I must admit there was a couple secrets
I held inside
But just know that I tried
To always apologize
And I'ma have you first always in my heart
To keep you satisfied

[Chorus]

Got every right to wanna leave
Got every right to wanna go
Got every right to hit the road
And never talk to me no more
You don't even have to call
Even check for me at all
Because the way I been actin' lately
Has been off the wall
Especially toward you
Puttin' girls before you
And they watchin' everything I been doin'
Just to hurt you
Most of it just ain't true
Ain't true
And they won't show you
How much of a queen you are to me
And why I love you baby

[Chorus]

Oh oh oh oh oh
'Cause I got you
'Cause I got you
Oh
'Cause I got you babe
'Cause I got you

Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
'Cause I got you babe
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
'Cause I got you babe
'Cause we gon' fight
Oh yes we gonn' fight
Believe we gon' fight
We gonna fight
Fight for our right to love yeah
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
'Cause I got you
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
'Cause I got you babe
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
'Cause I got you babe
'Cause we gon' fight
Oh yes we gon' fight
Believe we gon' fight
We gonna fight
Fight for our right to love yeah
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
'Cause I got you

2009-06-25T04:39:00.001-07:00

went for some light swimming today , praying that the knee will heal faster.. its a whole lot of dung coming to me..i really need more time to study .. damn..
and this whole holidays is like a .. i donno wat.. dint really do anything fulfilling, and i just feel like effing myself.. I MUST KEEP REMINDING MYSELF.. i wanna be the best .. the best and nothing but the best..so screw everything and start working my ass off like crazy!

2009-06-24T06:08:00.000-07:00

Its really time to blog, i have not been blogging for like a month due to various reasons.. damn.. but blog is what rally keeps me going i think, some sorta dillusional motivation..
First of all, i noe that power is not ok, i really hope that i could be there for her and really be an aid to make her feel better..
I must also really get down to study, i havent really mugged for block test!!! DAMN!
And also i really thinko its time i should be training up more.. working hard and stuffs..
Lastly i really wanna thank those that had kept my life rolling for this holiday.. all my bros , especially ho, thanks bro!

2009-05-16T07:24:00.000-07:00

I will wait for you, cause you are worth waiting for...
I will fight for you, cause you are worth figthing for...
I will live for you, cause you are worth living for...
I will die for you, cause you are worth dying for...
I just want you to know that you are... the only one that i will fight, live and die for..

2009-05-11T04:43:00.001-07:00

AGENT ZERO

2009-05-08T18:44:00.000-07:00

Damn..havent been training hard nowadayas..i just realised that im getting more and more lazy, its time to hit the gym and swimming pool more regularly, and of cos the court..yea..my poor little power is sick, take care kay!

2009-05-02T06:03:00.000-07:00

Omg i think i will be freaking broke after this weekend after i indulge in my birthday ' goodies'.. new wallet, watches , shoes.. ah alot more stuffs i want! i need a new phone, my phones abit cokked up. Today went out with pri school clique, thought only dan going but in the end more tuned up.. Jf super bastard, bastard some sec 4 kid while playing id..then i was laughing like crazy. Today we talked a hell load of crap about S.E.X in macs, so damn funny..and our shoot,shag,marry joke..i am gonna try that on all my bros someday, ROFL!
And omg i cant see my motivation for the whole weekend.. i miss u, seriously

2009-04-30T19:39:00.000-07:00

Thanks Shunyu, i really like what u posted on the blog.. YEA AS STABLE AS A TABLE.. LOL hahaha!

Happy Egg-Teen

2009-04-30T19:07:00.001-07:00

yea i am finally 18, legal for alcohol, m-18s and uhum..haha!
I really appreciate that ' Power ' celebrated with me my bday . rofl, if you know who i am refering to. went to manhattan fish market which i think the foods quite value for money and after that went to some spanish pub situated at the clarke quay riverside for a margarita drink! yea man, first time i bought alcohol without having to worry about ic checks! And omg, that glass of starwberry margarita is so freaking expensive, 15.30 . it burned a hole in my damn pocket, but i really liked the taste of it.. we chilled out at the pub till 5 plus 6 and proceed home because bad english have to go to club with her sistas at night..
This year my most beloved present came way early before my eighteen.. and haha i hope the person reading this understand what i mean by my most 'Beloved Present'..

I know this is a super long post but i still have more things to say..
Thanks chinyang, evelyn, shaowei, alvin, kyung , dan, shunyu, shouheng, kangjin.. whom had wrote on the card... and really super super thanks to my beloved bro cy for decorating the card , i feel the every sincere thought in that card.. and to be frank, its the first time i ever ever received a bday card, i have never in my life received birthday cards! Thanks Bros
And,
thanks for the bday wishes by all my beloved juniors, Daryl, Sherman, Jeredy, Derrick, Terence.. and all whom had wished me a happy bday..
and also to people from my sgs Eliza, Charis, Ashley, Suria, Lorna, Nadene, Grace
and ctg, Euhpiora, Eugene, Fadli, Gail, Chermaine..and alot alot more
and to EVERYONe who wished me happy bday, i really cant rmb who.. but thanks to all

Hey BROS!.. also lots thanks to u all for remberng my bday, jf , marc , dan, gina,jy, xy... we will stay the same no matter where we are..WOO! and apologies to marc for not able to turn up on thursday night..

Last but not least there are promises and resolutions on my bday..
1) Spend more time with bros
2) Really focus in studies
3) Basketball 'A' Divs Championships
4) Quarrel Less withe 'Power' definitely, and not telling lies and breaking promises
5) Spend the rest of my life with 'Power'..

2009-04-27T05:19:00.000-07:00

And yes you are my motivation!!! and will always be okay..hahaha!

2009-04-27T05:15:00.000-07:00

friday night i went out with bros for dinner at ljs
saturday was a rest day, i went swimming at night
sunday went out with her and bought bear
thats all for my weekend, i so lazy to blog..yay!
and yea,, 17 again is nice.. i like it when zac efron said " basketballs not my future, you are.." haha i dunno if i will say that someday

2009-04-22T05:47:00.000-07:00

Sometimes you get mad over certain stuffs when you dotn get the answer, i mean serious mad where you will crawl your scalps and try to cry..i need the answer..
i need motivation to keep me going..

2009-04-17T20:01:00.000-07:00

oh yea, i forgot give credits to marcus for helping me beautify this damn blog, thanks bro! woo

update my blog

2009-04-17T19:52:00.000-07:00

see sometimes in life u just gotta prioritise..and yea
i am bad at it.
ok i really have to sort things out since my lifes getting abit screwed up nowadays
thursday we got heats , i fucked up my 4oom and shotput, feel like damn loser, dun even noe why i am interested to join this shit in the first place, and i still got 1.5k..i bet i cant beat the soccer players and their metal lungs, but just gonna give it a try,
movie and ton.. havent been into this kinda crazy shit for a long while, look forward to tonight.
lets get some crazy hell yea! haha

Just Updated

2009-04-12T06:09:00.000-07:00

i just updated my blog, hope readers like it! though its kinda homo, its really me! loud and different.. yea and i am addicted to ppp-poler face nowadays, rofl!

Damn tired

2009-04-08T07:05:00.001-07:00

Just realised that jc life is like so .. Grr.. work work training training..dun even have time for other stuffs really. seriously.. i mean its so diff from sec school..i kinda dread it now.. but anyways my motivation is still burning strong.. and so will pull through..
cos wanna be
number 1 in the game, and number 1 in...
lets keep the second part to myself only..haha

The Unsung Hero

2009-04-03T20:57:00.000-07:00

Look at National JC number 15 , hes my source of inspiration in changing my style of game, its never again catch and shoot..its the shaking and dishing that keeps the tempo going. Man he actually controlled the whole tempo of the game in the A divisions basketball match on monday against Rjc. F-ed referee screwed up his game and the whole NJC team, they should have won. Nonetheless, hes still a hero in my heart, respected. and i really want to face him on the same court..its an honour

I REALLY FORGOT TO WISH U HAPPY BDAY

2009-04-01T09:10:00.001-07:00

Sorry Xueer, forgot to wish u happy bday on my blog like for so super long.. omg omg. Do you still wan the baby-g. Damn still owes u a present, i feel so bad now :(. how bout i buy u YOUR present on MY birthday.. lol, i think thats random but thats the only reason i can buy you something since your bday is like so long over

Sorry david yours as well, i will get you 1 soon,,i really felt super bad
and so is shun...ah!!!! damn i really owe alot of ppl bday presents presents and presents and ..ah dunno what to say.
How bout i just celebrate all your birthdays this friday my hommies..lol

Resolutions!

2009-04-01T09:05:00.000-07:00

this is my this year's resolution.. hope can achieve it.
1)YJC Bball Team Captain
2)Play for Mingyi or Tagawa
3)Top 10% in level for promos
4)Seriously Hot Bod
5)Mmm.. lets keep this a secret?

A little bout my life

2009-03-29T05:32:00.000-07:00

i just learn a new way of prounouncing "eclipse" from xue er. lol i so mean..haha dun care, thats bruce. LOL LOL.. the camps like not as nice as the one last november, adni dunno why, i am very lazy to blog, argh, anyway i injured my leg..cant do intensive excercise for 2 weeks..damn..i feel like dying now, injury sucks!

2009-03-21T08:46:00.000-07:00

a song by faber drive, i have been addicted to this for the past week...

Faber Drive- Tongue Tied

Bright, cold silver moon.
Tonight alone in my room.
You were here just yesterday.
Slight turn of the head,
eyes end when u said, I guess I need my life to change.
Seems like somethings just not the same.
What could say?

I need a little more luck, than a little bit,
cause everytime I get stuck, the words won't fit.
And everytime that I try to get tongue tied, I need a little good love to get me by.
I need a little more help, than a little bit.
Like the perfect one word no one should get.
Cause everytime that I try to get tongue tied, I need a little good love to me by this time.

I stare up at the stars,
I wonder just where you are,
you feel a million miles away. (I wonder just where you are).
Was it something I said, or something I never did.
Or was I always in the way. (Was it something I did).
Can someone tell me what to say, to just make you stay.

I need a little more luck, than a little bit,
cause everytime I get stuck, the words won't fit.
And everytime that I try to get toungue tied, I need a little good love to get me by.
I need a little more help, than a little bit.
Like the perfect one word no one should get.
Cause everytime that I try to get tongue tied, I need a little good love to me by this time.

I know it feels like again,
to want to be here again.
And we could help each other off the ground, so we never fall down again. And what it takes I don't care,
were gonna make it I swear.
And we could help each other off the ground, so we never fall down again, again.

I need a little more luck, than a little bit,
cause everytime I get stuck, the words won't fit.
And everytime that I try to get toungue tied, I need a little good love to get me by.
I need a little more help, than a little bit.
Like the perfect one word no one should get.
Cause everytime that I try to get tongue tied, I need a little good love to me by this time.

I know it feels like again,
to want to be here again.
And we could help each other off the ground, so we never fall down again. And what it takes I don't care,
were gonna make it I swear.
And we could help each other off the ground, so we never fall down again, again.

Friends

2009-03-18T21:36:00.000-07:00

I just realised that life is tiring, and its screwed, fucked up piece of shit. But its the friends around u that colours it . They help u forget your sorrows, swallow your anger, dump your ego. Theres nothing like being around your friends..

Some Crap Test

2009-03-17T05:09:00.000-07:00

i took some crap test , a link from my friends blog and this is the result , LOL,after i took the test, i am like, am i really like that?

Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You have many goals and want to achieve as much as you can. The jobs you enjoy are those that let you burn off your considerable excess energy.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

Bros, i just wanna share this with u all

2009-03-16T07:44:00.000-07:00

a hundred million bucks?
a luxurious condo?
a job which pays 10k a month?
straight As for A Levels?
the perfect boyfriend or girlfriend?

sometimes its the little things in life that matter.

a piece of chocolate,
a complement,
a hug,
or even just a smile.

spread the happiness, spread the joy

because this doesnt last forever.

*(ANYWAY I COPE THIS FROM MARCUS, ROFL!)

A new chapter, A new beginning

2009-03-15T01:28:00.000-07:00

"Life's not about wating for the storm to pass, but learning how to dance in the rain" The old bruce is back , stronger than ever! I got nothing much to say, but its gonna be work work, and less talk. I am gonna share this speech by Al Pacino with the team, to spur them up before the a divs

Al Pacino's Inch By Inch speech from Any Given Sunday

I don't know what to say really.
Three minutes
to the biggest battle of our professional lives
all comes down to today.
Either
we heal
as a team
or we are going to crumble.
Inch by inch
play by play
till we're finished.
We are in hell right now, gentlemen
believe me
and
we can stay here
and get the shit kicked out of us
or
we can fight our way
back into the light.
We can climb out of hell.
One inch, at a time.

Now I can't do it for you.
I'm too old.
I look around and I see these young faces
and I think
I mean
I made every wrong choice a middle age man could make.
I uh....
I pissed away all my money
believe it or not.
I chased off
anyone who has ever loved me.
And lately,
I can't even stand the face I see in the mirror.

You know when you get old in life
things get taken from you.
That's, that's part of life.
But,
you only learn that when you start losing stuff.
You find out that life is just a game of inches.
So is football.
Because in either game
life or football
the margin for error is so small.
I mean
one half step too late or to early
you don't quite make it.
One half second too slow or too fast
and you don't quite catch it.
The inches we need are everywhere around us.
They are in ever break of the game
every minute, every second.

On this team, we fight for that inch
On this team, we tear ourselves, and everyone around us
to pieces for that inch.
We CLAW with our finger nails for that inch.
Cause we know
when we add up all those inches
that's going to make the fucking difference
between WINNING and LOSING
between LIVING and DYING.

I'll tell you this
in any fight
it is the guy who is willing to die
who is going to win that inch.
And I know
if I am going to have any life anymore
it is because, I am still willing to fight, and die for that inch
because that is what LIVING is.
The six inches in front of your face.

Now I can't make you do it.
You gotta look at the guy next to you.
Look into his eyes.
Now I think you are going to see a guy who will go that inch with you.
You are going to see a guy
who will sacrifice himself for this team
because he knows when it comes down to it,
you are gonna do the same thing for him.

That's a team, gentlemen
and either we heal now, as a team,
or we will die as individuals.
That's football guys.
That's all it is.
Now, whattaya gonna do?

and i dun see the difference in the attitude that we all should have towards our passion and or life

fuck life!

2009-03-13T08:09:00.000-07:00

i seriously dunno whats wrong with me nowadays, and i am beginning to hate myself. i dissapointed all my friends, made all of them feel bad, and recently, i got no mood to do stuffs at all. WHY! just about the team, does it really makes me feel that bad? what do i need really, what do i need. fuck , i am beginning to hate basketball, its beginning to take away from me everything. First, my interest in studies, and now my bros and buddies, whats so damn wrong with me.

Loser

2009-03-11T08:07:00.000-07:00

yea, i dint make the team, i feel like a loser, yes thats me, cant control my egos, i really hope jem and kangjin's ok! Bros, remember, we are a team. and i think its unfair, some of them dint even fight for the team and they got in. I still got another year, but not for kumo and jem. I am not afraid to say, i cried for almost an hour today after they announce the results, i am sad over so many things..my bros..these things keep coming to my mind, u are a FUCKING LOSER, FUCKING FAT FUCK, FUCKING RETAINEE, FUCKING BASTARD, FUCKING FATSO, FUCKING CLOWN.. damn i am a FUCKING GOOD FOR NOTHING!
my feelings all mixed up, damn it , this a damn freaking pain thing. I still remember what ryan told me today, even if i dun make the team i must be proud of myself i lost so much weight, and i said no, i want to be nothing but the best!
but anyways WE ARE ALWAYS A TEAM! U GUYS BETTER PLAY WELL
gotto sleep early today, tmr rebound for chinyang !
I SWEAR I HAVE NEVER FELT THAT FUCKING PAINFUL !

8th March 2009

2009-03-07T16:14:00.000-08:00

i wanted to blog last night, but was so damn tired that i doze off on the bed while reading the papers. Yesterday the yj j2 teams played against an outside team called Freedom. we were leading by so much and in the end we lost by 1 point. I think i am the greatest cause of losing. Think through alot, if i dint make the shot and passed it to chinyang, it would have been a different story. But Chinyang was right, he would rather me learn through this mistake, and could remind me of what to do and what not to do when i am on the court. And i just reliased that, playing a game aint easy.
Anyway,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SI YUAN!. omg hope u like the karaoke thing, and the way she sang is so funny! I bet all of us had a hell of a fun time! sorry dint buy you anything, really super sorry!

and damn it i forgot do my sets last night!!!!

Resolutions

2009-03-05T04:12:00.000-08:00

Just now while i was having dinner, i am thinking about things i want to achieve by next two week, and i feel like listing it down.

1) Try not to do stupid stuffs and be serious for a day!
2) Save for the Kenneth Cole watch that i wanted super long ago!
3) Slim down by at least 5 kg! den i will get my ideal weight!
4) Be able to do at 20.4kg asides for bench presses, and 12 per sets.
5) strive below 11 mins for my 2.4
6) make my 3 oint fgp higher thatn 60 percent

Note: they are not in sequence of importance, each is equally important

My Motivation

2009-03-04T08:10:00.000-08:00

"I'm Gilbert Arenas and this is my story. The first 40 games of my career, I sat on the bench. They thought that I was a zero. Instead of being bitter, I just practiced,practiced. It wasn't even about basketball anymore, it was about proving them wrong. I wear number 0 because, it reminds me that i am gonna go out there and fight every day!"- Gilbert Arenas

2009-03-04T07:57:00.000-08:00

(TEAM BROTAK)
These questions keep coming to me, what if i dont make the team, what if i dont do well for A levels, stuffs like that. Anyway i really really wanna retain cos i cant cope with all these anymore. At least slowing down the pace of my life can give me more time to sort things out, and more time to build up on my j1 foundation. Also i wanna play basketball, and win games, i dunnot want to live in regrets like how i did in sec 3 when i quit the team. This time i gonna give it all. Alvin talked to me and tell me to consider over it again, asking me question like if i wll regret retaining, and the answer is no. I am so motivated now that i think nothing can stop me from training training and more training.i want to be nothing but the best!

And i thought through alot, i will still support the team if i dun make it! because i believe on court or not, we are still a team. I love this team, i swear i love them like i had never love anything that much. Every single person and the spirits bonded in us! I do not mind going that extra mile because i know that if i am there for them , they will be there for me. And thats what makes us a team!bros we will go out and fight for the a divs! once a xiong di, forever xiong di!

Dog in the middle of the desserts

2009-03-02T19:54:00.000-08:00

we saw this dog in the middle of the desserts of turkey, his like so cute, and keep following auntie pat

the very beginning

2009-03-02T18:58:00.000-08:00

Though the flu wasnt really that bad,I took a day off from school. to organise my stuffs , and rest myself. This is really draining, the trainings , assignments ( loads of it). I have never been a blogger all my life, and i dint know what got to me that i decided to blog all of the sudden. Perhaps its the urge to voice out and find something where i can let out my emotions. Damn, its getting more and more tiring but still have to persevere, like how gilbert does when hes in high school, go out there and fight everyday.This is my first post and i dont really have alot to write today. Maybe i will get some inspiration at night and continue writing.

I will sign off with a quote of the day
- Zero To Hero- Gilbert Arenas